A Moment

Carefully carrying my bundle I stepped into the room and made a bee line for the table. I placed my son on the pad and quickly began the work of changing his diaper knowing full well that the longer it took the harder it would be to get him to settled for sleep. As I unwrapped his diaper the cold air hit him like a wake up call and his eyes burst open trying to take in what he could. Having kept the light off the only light was coming from a small night light on the other side of the room and immediately Andrew's eyes found it. Taking care to make sure he didn't roll off the table while straining to see the light I changed him, dressed him, and scooped him up smiling as his eyes followed the light as we moved. Thinking how heavy he is getting I slowly lowered myself into the glider and began the smooth motion of rocking back and forth. With one hand supporting his bottom and the other lightly on back of his neck I eased Andrew's head down onto my chest and quietly began singing:

"Jesus loves me this I know, for the Bible tells me so. Little ones to him belong, they are weak but he is strong. Yes Jesus loves me, yes Jesus loves me, yes Jesus loves me the Bible tells me so."

Over and over I sang while slowly rocking. Even though Andrew stirred fighting the sleepiness that was over taking him I kept the motion of the glider constant and never wavered from my song. Over and over I sang while slowing rocking. Andrew began kicking his legs and rubbing at his eyes while whimpering, he cried out telling me that he was more tired than I thought. Keeping my hold on him light but still supporting him I allowed him to reposition himself down closer to the crook of my arm. Using my breast as a pillow he wrapped his body around my waist and took a position very similar to when he's feeding and at that angle the night light provided just enough light that I could clearly see his face. I smiled down at him, even though I know he couldn't see it, and my heart broke with love and pride at the treasure in my arms. Making note of the moment I knew I would remember it for many years to come for it was too precious to forget.

Over and over I sang while slowly rocking. I was able to watch as his eye lids grew heavy I felt his breathing become slow and constant and I listened as he gave a small sigh of contentment just as I finished the last line of my song. With out making a sound I stopped rocking and just looked down at my son. I have no idea how long I sat there just taking in his small face but I noticed his long eye lashes, the fact that his fingernails needed trimming, the way his checks puffed from his weight and the way he was laying against me, his recent development of a double chin that was hard to miss, the unmistakable likeness and handsomeness of his father.

Chuckling I began singing the same song again as I stood and made my way across the small room. With the utmost care I placed Andrew in the crib, made sure his pacifier was firmly in his mouth, and tucked him in. Seeing that his eyes popped open as I laid him down I sang my song one last time before bending to kiss his head and whisper that I loved him with a smile.

Even though I knew I didn't need to be quiet, Andrew could sleep through anything, I tip toed out of the room and went to ready myself for sleep keeping the image of his sweet sleeping face at the fore front of my mind.